Mission accomplished, now let's play cricket

It took a special combination of organisational incompetence and lack of will for our brave lads to manipulate themselves into a severe thrashing at the hands of the Hun.

I watched the first half and knew that the purple patch of flowing football played by England just before going in for a cup of tea and half an orange would be addressed by the German coaching staff. And so it was, according to the radio commentary I heard intermittently during the last 45 minutes.

What a contrast the two teams were. With one or two exceptions England had all the flair and experience but in this match as in the first three they were forced to play in a way that was not natural for most of the players. Germany, on the other hand, have a system and their players are selected for their ability to play to that system (a system which is itself devised with the main strengths of their best players in mind). If you want to produce a harmonious and fluent barbershop sound it's best not to pick Shirley Bassey, Englebert Humperdinck, Celine Dion and Tom Jones and tell each of them they are the star of the show.

Yes, Mr Lampard scored a perfectly good equaliser when the score was 2-1 in favour of Fritz and things might, just might, have been different had the referee and linesman's view not been impaired by brown envelopes stuffed with newly printed Euros. Nonetheless, the Krauts would have solidified their midfield and defence at half time just as they did with the score at 2-1.

Overall England's tournament was the shambles predicted here just two weeks ago. At least South Africa's reserve team is giving us a little pride on the cricket field.